Her unnatural calm was giving way. He turned round toward her and found her looking at him and standing very still. And in these crowded four weeks, what had she learned? That all horizons were lies: that smiles and handshakes and goodbyes and welcomes were lies: that there were really no to-morrows, only a treadmill of to-days: and that out of these lies and mirages she had plucked a bitter truth—she was alone. That was the true miracle of the gift; without actual experience, to imagine love and hate and greed and how they would react upon each other; and then, when these passions had served their temporary purpose, to cast them aside for new imaginings. But for a long time, anyhow, we lovers have to be as if we were no more than friends. 186 < 23 > A SEDUCTION, 1983 Christmas season came and went, and with it Christmas Break. ‘Very well, then. She wanted to stay where she was; but tears were dangerous; the more she wept, the weaker she would become defensively. You told me he was going back to Newgate after supper, so I mayn't have another opportunity. "I beg pardon," he said.
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